I also often tend to ignore so call "swallowing hazard" recalls. Not because I don't understand the danger involved in a kid swallowing a random Polly Pocket or Littlest Pet Shop magnet, but because I do. That's why, when I children in this house who were little enough for this to be a concern, I simply didn't have those types of products around--going so far as to return the Polly Pocket Mega Mall Diva Girl got for Christmas back when Zen Baby really was a baby. At that point in our family life, wee toys like that just weren't a good idea. Nearly 4 years later, however, we have buckets of Pollies, and Santa will be leaving a couple of Pet Shop playsets Christmas morning. He won't, however, be leaving them any Aquadots, although this is the number one toy on both of their lists.

This latest recall leaves me a shaken and angry. This toy doesn't present some random hazard to kids that is largely the byproduct of poor parental thought processes. This product will drug your child. And not in that good, cold medicine kind of way. No, Aquadots, apparently, are kiddie roofies. The date rape drug. Conveniently manufactured right at your own kitchen table!

My problem with this toy isn't even the fact that it could poison, perhaps even kill, a child. After all, "may" does not mean "will" and "poses a hazard when swallowed" does not exactly translate into "Your kid will absolutely eat this and die!" My problem is that this is a very serious drug. One with terrible applications. And the fact that you can just buy a machine at Toys "R" Us to pop out as many of the little suckers as your evening requires is disturbing, to say the least.

I feel for the Consumer Products Safety Commission, I really do. There are a lot of stupid people out there (the 23 families that required action on the Bumbo Issue spring to mind), and they spend every day dealing with the aftermath of that stupidity. Clearly, they are overworked in today's society. But I'm still starting to lose faith in their ability to do their jobs when shit like this keeps hitting the proverbial fan.

It's enough to make you start to think about opting out of buying toys altogether and instead send your kid off with some string and a cardboard tube and tell them to just use their imaginations. Of course, the tube is probably coated with some sort of dangerous chemical, and the string is a choking hazard....